There is no Simon Cowell in Korea to put people properly in their place. So after watching today's Super Star K, and not understanding what the judges were saying, here are a few things that I wish they were saying.
1. I was moved to tears by your song. Not because it was good, but because I was embarrassed for you.
2. I'm sorry you lost. It wasn't just my poor judge's score that made you loose, the whole country voted against you. You are the worst person in Korea.
3. I know that when you loose, you are going to apologize to your parents for failing. If I were them, I wouldn't let you back into our house.
4. Come on, even the Wonder Girls sing better than that. I mean The Wonder Girls. I used to work at a chicken slaughterhouse, and I've heard better harmonizing from chickens being murdered, and you can't even match the Wonder Girls. Here's the address to the Ha-Rim chicken farms, go learn how to sing.
5. Don't waste your money on singing lessons. Auto-tune me.