Monday, July 27, 2009

The Worst Cooking Show Ever

I searched my thesaurus, but couldn't find enough synonyms for the word bad, or one potent enough to describe Jim Kruska's latest foray into the world of film making. Other films by Kruska have featured him cast in the role as mountain adventurer, sword fighter, but in Kruska's latest project he plays the role of health guru/chef, and as a result viewers would be cautioned against dining in any establishment that features him at the helm in the kitchen. (As a freshman in college he anchored a kitchen of an establishment that went out of business after a malfunction of a walk in refrigerator.)

In standard vlog format, the film starts out with the custom vlogger pose of the person who thinks that the conversations one has with them self is interesting enough to film and put on the internet. However in Kruska's case, the fast eyes that dart about reminds viewers of someone on their first date. Indeed, one gets the feeling that Kruska feels anxious even when talking to himself.

The film then cuts to an unexplained shot of boiling chicken. One is later supposed to piece together that the shot following the boiling chicken is the frozen block of chicken broth that was the product of the boiling chicken from the day before. In the hands of a real film maker, this would have been explained.

The frozen block of chicken broth goes on to set the tone for the rest of the film and how appetizing everything looks next to a frozen block of chicken broth, which Kruska unfortunately refers to as a "chickensicle," and unsanitarly beats with a wooden sword.

As a taster, I would have to say that a saving grace of the film would be that the soup actually tastes pretty good, but as a film critic, I would say that Kruska's career as a film maker is going to be a short one.

1 comment:

Matthew Awalt said...

Nice Ooohs and Ahhhs.....I especially liked how you underestimated the volume of your pot after the CHIC-SICKL had melted and always caused a calamity. Anyways, I was impressed with the hot -to-do-a-soup in a pot.