Tuesday, August 30, 2011

My Terrible Idea

My son is four months old now. He is really cute. I think so, and it tends to be the consensus of all of the people who see him when we go out. The guy gets a lot of attention and he is happy to smile at his adoring fans.

Sometimes they get a little Bieber crazy and actually touch him...without permission. This one crazy guy on the street came up to him and started playing with his feet while he was in in his stroller. Some lady in Homeplus came up to him and touched his head.

My wife has joked about baby modeling to help pay for his college, but I don't think that is a good idea. I don't trust people in show business. But I did come up with another terrible idea from which we can make a little side cash off this baby, and perhaps it would be a good way to get people to leave him alone when we are out and about.

The terrible idea:
My son can become a living advertizement for my sperm samples. All I have to do is get a little bumper sticker that says that with my phone number and post it above his head in the stroller. Good people would probably get offended and leave. People with fertility problems might take the number down and give me a call.

I think it's a win win win situation. People will leave me alone at the store. I can earn a little cash on the side. Also I can charge my trip to Baskin Robbins as a part of the delivery expenses. If you have ever been to Baskin Robbins in Korea, and if you have ever gotten a pint of ice cream to go, you would know that they ask you how long it takes to get to your house and then they chip off some dry ice to pack with the pints.

They can just ask me, "Hey how long does it take to get to your house?"

I can say, "One to two business days." They will then give me a bowl of dry ice that I can then use to pack with my sample to send to hopeful couples.

Everybody wins...except my son if he ever finds out about it. That would be the time to do the whole midnight runner thing.

*This blog post should be submitted for "worst father of the year award."

**This is one of those times when I'm happy that nobody reads this damn thing.

***I'm sure glad I didn't post the video or express my opinion about that guy issuing a beat down on the bus, that would make this post look really bad, also people might actually come here to hear my thoughts on the matter...which they really shouldn't care about, I'm not that bright.


Eve said...

Hah! Sell your kid's cuteness to advertising, just pull him out before it gets too crazy. Plenty of money for his college fund. :)

I'm not especially bright either (I seriously think my intelligence is average at best). And there's something to be said about keeping oneself out of controversial matters. Makes life easier for one thing. Plus, it's too damn TIME-CONSUMING for DAYS! Sometimes,I wish I could keep my damn mouth shut. :)

3gyupsal said...

Eve, I agree with most of what you said on your blog about the situation with that guy. I thought the whole thing turned into a bit of a bandwagon though.

He is very cute, although he gets most of the love from Korean people, westerners who I have run into just kind of ignore him, and he got a sneer from some Indian lady. It is really hard to take him to homeplus because people don't get the fuck out of the way...they rarely do that anyway, but with him it is worse.

Debbie said...

One to two business days, hmmm?