A long time ago, when I was in college. I would try to pick up women by going to coffee shops and reading liberal news magazines to myself. It was my way of being deep.
Jinju doesn't have many good independant poet's cafes where people can look important by reading important looking things, but people can do that in the new cafe benes that have opened all over the place.
It was at the 진주 산업 대학교 cafe bene where I composed this:
때뜨로 생각......
....나는 새......
어떤 새?
가마귀?
매기?
안뇨 매기 는
생선입니다......
한잔 더 하래?
(Look I know there are mistakes in the Korean, leave a comment correcting it, or don't, I don't care.)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Another I love Jinju Post Comming Soon
I rode my bike to work today.
My ride was possible because Jinju has an Awswome bike path that stretches the length of the town.
The bike road runs next to the river.
A lot of people bitch about how they can't see much nature in Korea. They Bitch about how you can't see many animals or birds.
I used to do that too.
But these days whenever ride my bike next to the river, I always see herons, and eagles.
Today I saw a flock of some kind of white sea birds with yellow heads. They looked like some kind of heron but they were smaller.
If I see them again I'll take a picture and put it up.
In the meantime here is another post on another blog about the bike path.
My ride was possible because Jinju has an Awswome bike path that stretches the length of the town.
The bike road runs next to the river.
A lot of people bitch about how they can't see much nature in Korea. They Bitch about how you can't see many animals or birds.
I used to do that too.
But these days whenever ride my bike next to the river, I always see herons, and eagles.
Today I saw a flock of some kind of white sea birds with yellow heads. They looked like some kind of heron but they were smaller.
If I see them again I'll take a picture and put it up.
In the meantime here is another post on another blog about the bike path.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Taco Bell in Seoul to Destablize Region
Seoul, South Korea
"Yeah, I'm a vegan, but come on it's taco bell. I haven't seen one of these things in like four months, that's how long I have lived in Korea." Kimmie Swain said this as she was entering the new Taco Bell in Seoul's Itaewan district.
The new Taco Bell has been met with a sense of bliss among many in the Korea expat community. Brian Jorgansen, a New Hampshire native had this to say, "Yeah I like worked at a hagwon for two years, but I went home because for western food in Seoul there was just you know McDonalds, Burger King, Pizza Hut, Kraze Burger, Dominoes, a lot of little places where you could spaghetti, Quiznos, Starbucks, KFC, Popeye's, Mom's touch, but no Taco Bell. After I heard about Taco Bell I went on Dave's and found a job at an academy outside of Itewon. Working in Korea is going to rule now."
Taco Bell doesn't just have expats excited though, a Korean who just went by the name Lee mentioned his excitement too. "Finally, I can eat spicy food that isn't Korea. Do you know that Korea's food is the spiciest in the world? I used to think that other country's foods weren't as spicy as Korea, but then I had food at Taco Bell and now my palate is happy. I can now eat spicy food from other countries during the summer. I like to eat hot and spicy food during the summer because one time I ate an ice cream cone when I was hot and I ended up spending a month in the hospital. Then the next summer I had a bowl of cold noodles and after that I just didn't want to eat anything for four hours. It was obvious that I had lost my appetite from eating something cold. But with Taco bell, I can eat hot food in the summer so that I don't get sick.
Not everyone is happy about the new Taco Bell, though. North Korean leader Kim Jeong Ill was reported to have gone completely bananas over the announcement of the new Taco Bell. The KCNA in Japan has reported that Kim Jeong Ill has once again vowed to "wash the faces of South Koreans in their own blood and tears."
Lee Myung Bak, in an announcement to parliament outlined the programming for the speakers that will be placed at the boarder, "Yeah we pretty much decided on playing Detroit's 94.7 WSCX, twenty four hours of classic rock is WSCX sexy!! Hell yeah, those mother f*ckers in the north are gonna get a double even triple doses of fog hat and the Nuge. Let freedom ring bitches. Kim Jeong Ill, an avid fan of classic rock from the 60s,70s, and even today expressed his dismay over the Taco Bell ads that start with that bell sound, and end with those guys singing that annoying song about making a run for the boarder.
Kim Jeong Ill was quoted from his underwater AIDS research center in Beaktu San. "I mean this is complete bullshit. The only people that can leave this country are my kidnapped Japanese chefs who I am going to send to taco bell to pick up some chalupas. I cannot believe this, now the puppet regime to the south is now broadcasting this shit on the boarder. Down town Seoul will burn in flames so hot that the ghosts will burn. And get this fucking Naengmyeon out of my face, It's July asshole. Don't you know that if you eat cold food in the summer you get syphilis? Bring me some Teoboki in a piping hot Ddookbaegi that is being heated over an open flame, also close the windows and bring me a sweater."
Later when we caught up with Kimmie Swain, she seemed somewhat disappointed. "Yeah, back home I never really went to Taco Bell, I pretty much forgot how gross it was. I mean I remember my friend telling me that the meat that they serve at taco bell is a grade below what they use for dog food. I totally forgot about that and now I have a stomachache, probably not as bad as the stomachache that I would have gotten if I drank a glass of cold water, but a stomachache nonetheless."
"Yeah, I'm a vegan, but come on it's taco bell. I haven't seen one of these things in like four months, that's how long I have lived in Korea." Kimmie Swain said this as she was entering the new Taco Bell in Seoul's Itaewan district.
The new Taco Bell has been met with a sense of bliss among many in the Korea expat community. Brian Jorgansen, a New Hampshire native had this to say, "Yeah I like worked at a hagwon for two years, but I went home because for western food in Seoul there was just you know McDonalds, Burger King, Pizza Hut, Kraze Burger, Dominoes, a lot of little places where you could spaghetti, Quiznos, Starbucks, KFC, Popeye's, Mom's touch, but no Taco Bell. After I heard about Taco Bell I went on Dave's and found a job at an academy outside of Itewon. Working in Korea is going to rule now."
Taco Bell doesn't just have expats excited though, a Korean who just went by the name Lee mentioned his excitement too. "Finally, I can eat spicy food that isn't Korea. Do you know that Korea's food is the spiciest in the world? I used to think that other country's foods weren't as spicy as Korea, but then I had food at Taco Bell and now my palate is happy. I can now eat spicy food from other countries during the summer. I like to eat hot and spicy food during the summer because one time I ate an ice cream cone when I was hot and I ended up spending a month in the hospital. Then the next summer I had a bowl of cold noodles and after that I just didn't want to eat anything for four hours. It was obvious that I had lost my appetite from eating something cold. But with Taco bell, I can eat hot food in the summer so that I don't get sick.
Not everyone is happy about the new Taco Bell, though. North Korean leader Kim Jeong Ill was reported to have gone completely bananas over the announcement of the new Taco Bell. The KCNA in Japan has reported that Kim Jeong Ill has once again vowed to "wash the faces of South Koreans in their own blood and tears."
Lee Myung Bak, in an announcement to parliament outlined the programming for the speakers that will be placed at the boarder, "Yeah we pretty much decided on playing Detroit's 94.7 WSCX, twenty four hours of classic rock is WSCX sexy!! Hell yeah, those mother f*ckers in the north are gonna get a double even triple doses of fog hat and the Nuge. Let freedom ring bitches. Kim Jeong Ill, an avid fan of classic rock from the 60s,70s, and even today expressed his dismay over the Taco Bell ads that start with that bell sound, and end with those guys singing that annoying song about making a run for the boarder.
Kim Jeong Ill was quoted from his underwater AIDS research center in Beaktu San. "I mean this is complete bullshit. The only people that can leave this country are my kidnapped Japanese chefs who I am going to send to taco bell to pick up some chalupas. I cannot believe this, now the puppet regime to the south is now broadcasting this shit on the boarder. Down town Seoul will burn in flames so hot that the ghosts will burn. And get this fucking Naengmyeon out of my face, It's July asshole. Don't you know that if you eat cold food in the summer you get syphilis? Bring me some Teoboki in a piping hot Ddookbaegi that is being heated over an open flame, also close the windows and bring me a sweater."
Later when we caught up with Kimmie Swain, she seemed somewhat disappointed. "Yeah, back home I never really went to Taco Bell, I pretty much forgot how gross it was. I mean I remember my friend telling me that the meat that they serve at taco bell is a grade below what they use for dog food. I totally forgot about that and now I have a stomachache, probably not as bad as the stomachache that I would have gotten if I drank a glass of cold water, but a stomachache nonetheless."
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Tips for Surviving the Rainy Season
The Korean media and expat blogosphere have been abuzz with many ways of beating the heat in the summer. I would like to remind my readers though that Korean summers aren't just massive heatwaves, there is also the monsoon part of the Korean summer that is happening just about now. So as a service to many newbies to Korea who have probably never experienced rain before, I would like to provide some pointers on how to stay dry.
1. Don't go outside.
2. If you are inside and you are nearby an open window and it is raining, close it.
3. If you do go outside take an umbrella.
4. They have these things called rain coats that help keep you dry as well.
5. If you want to go somewhere, don't walk, take a car.
6. If you don't have a raincoat or umbrella, just go naked. One of the worst parts of being in the rain is getting your clothes wet.
7. If you do happen to get wet, change your clothes and use towel when you get home.
8. Eat Samgyupsal.
9. Drink Maggeoli and eat Pajun.
10. If you don't have any Samgyupsal, Maggeoli, or pajun, just eat something greasy like pizza, fried chicken, or Chinese food. You can have either of those things delivered making the poor bastard who has to deliver those things get wet. (Poor bastard also has to refuse tips.)
11. If you are in love with some woman who doesn't care about you, or who has chosen to be with someone else, get dressed up in a suit and stand in the rain while crying. Your eyes cannot produce enough tears to fully display your misery so sometimes you need mother nature's help.
12. If you are in love with some woman who thinks that you are a humorless uptight prat, show her that you are nothing of the sort by going out into the rain without an umbrella to show her your "down to earth side."
13. If you are an environmentalist who wants to show the dangers of acid rain; wear a paper outfit and allow the rain to dissolve it away.
14. If you are outside, go inside.
15. Get under something.
1. Don't go outside.
2. If you are inside and you are nearby an open window and it is raining, close it.
3. If you do go outside take an umbrella.
4. They have these things called rain coats that help keep you dry as well.
5. If you want to go somewhere, don't walk, take a car.
6. If you don't have a raincoat or umbrella, just go naked. One of the worst parts of being in the rain is getting your clothes wet.
7. If you do happen to get wet, change your clothes and use towel when you get home.
8. Eat Samgyupsal.
9. Drink Maggeoli and eat Pajun.
10. If you don't have any Samgyupsal, Maggeoli, or pajun, just eat something greasy like pizza, fried chicken, or Chinese food. You can have either of those things delivered making the poor bastard who has to deliver those things get wet. (Poor bastard also has to refuse tips.)
11. If you are in love with some woman who doesn't care about you, or who has chosen to be with someone else, get dressed up in a suit and stand in the rain while crying. Your eyes cannot produce enough tears to fully display your misery so sometimes you need mother nature's help.
12. If you are in love with some woman who thinks that you are a humorless uptight prat, show her that you are nothing of the sort by going out into the rain without an umbrella to show her your "down to earth side."
13. If you are an environmentalist who wants to show the dangers of acid rain; wear a paper outfit and allow the rain to dissolve it away.
14. If you are outside, go inside.
15. Get under something.
JYP's Latest Girl Band Steals from the Maury Povich Show
This is J.Y.P.'s new girl band Miss A. I kind of like the beats in the beginning. They don't sing great but they sound better than the Wonder Girls when they sing live. (Don't get me started on the Wonder Girls Live.)
Plagerism in the K-pop community pops up quite often. K-pop artists borrow baselines quite frequently, without paying for them.
But I can't forgive Miss A for stealing from America's troubled youthes. For nearly a decade America's out of controll teens have gone on day time talk shows to tell us one thing and one thing only; that we don't know them ******** you I had sex with all of them ********** you don't know me.
It makes me sad these troubled children can't even keep their own universal catch phrase.
On a different note. I often worry about raising children in Korea because the teachers beat students, and the traffic is incredibly frieghtening. When I worry about those things, I should just watch these clips, and worry about what kind of monsters I might spawn if I raise kids in America.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
A Real Tip for Something that you Should do Before Coming to Korea
Bring a fire alarm.
They are hard to find here, and there have been a few cases of English teachers who have died in fires.
The post "Ultimate Korea Survivor Guide," was kind of a joke based on something I read on another blog, but I'm serious here.
I don't make some kind of "All Koreans," statement where I condemn the entire society, but I have seen some a few outstanding cases of negligence in fire safety.
I should point out that most meat grilling places probably wouldn't fly in America because of both the raw meat and the burning charcoal (commie socialist country dominated by OSHA.) I over look these because 고기 집들 are always fun.
But I have lived in at least two dormitories in Korea were the front doors were chained closed with bicycle locks. Someone challenged the director of the dormitory at the university where I worked that in case of a fire, chaining the dormitory door shut is probably a stupid idea. The director's response was that since the doors were glass, somebody could just break the door down and everything will be hunky dory....
Then there is the other thing that I have noticed; smoke alarms are almost impossible to get here. I asked my wife where you can get a smoke alarm and she didn't know. We went to Top Mart and Homeplus in search of smoke alarms too. When asked why they didn't have smoke alarms the people who worked there said something about how most apartment buildings already have fire systems. That is "apartment buildings," not one or two room buildings, where many English teachers and working class Koreans live.
So if you want to come to Korea and want to do all that you can, to protect yourself from burning to death in a fire that is cause by some asshole throwing his cigarette but mindlessly to the ground, go to a Wall mart or something and pick up a smoke alarm. Hell, pick up twenty smoke alarms and try to sell them to other people.
They are hard to find here, and there have been a few cases of English teachers who have died in fires.
The post "Ultimate Korea Survivor Guide," was kind of a joke based on something I read on another blog, but I'm serious here.
I don't make some kind of "All Koreans," statement where I condemn the entire society, but I have seen some a few outstanding cases of negligence in fire safety.
I should point out that most meat grilling places probably wouldn't fly in America because of both the raw meat and the burning charcoal (commie socialist country dominated by OSHA.) I over look these because 고기 집들 are always fun.
But I have lived in at least two dormitories in Korea were the front doors were chained closed with bicycle locks. Someone challenged the director of the dormitory at the university where I worked that in case of a fire, chaining the dormitory door shut is probably a stupid idea. The director's response was that since the doors were glass, somebody could just break the door down and everything will be hunky dory....
Then there is the other thing that I have noticed; smoke alarms are almost impossible to get here. I asked my wife where you can get a smoke alarm and she didn't know. We went to Top Mart and Homeplus in search of smoke alarms too. When asked why they didn't have smoke alarms the people who worked there said something about how most apartment buildings already have fire systems. That is "apartment buildings," not one or two room buildings, where many English teachers and working class Koreans live.
So if you want to come to Korea and want to do all that you can, to protect yourself from burning to death in a fire that is cause by some asshole throwing his cigarette but mindlessly to the ground, go to a Wall mart or something and pick up a smoke alarm. Hell, pick up twenty smoke alarms and try to sell them to other people.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Mexican Food
Many folks in the blogging community seem to be excited about the new Taco Bell up in Seoul. If you are like me and enjoy Mexican food, but you live 3 and a half hours away from Seoul, here are some old posts on how to make homemade tortillas and taco meat. Hopefully this post can save you from feeling like a looser who spent up to 8 hours in a quest to eat at Taco Bell.
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